I look to you

My Dad loved music. He loved hearing us sing and play. When my Grandpa passed, years ago...My Dad and I got to sing together for the service. He offered it and wanted to sing "Oh Lord my Redeemer." It was one of his favorite songs. I was singing the 1st verse, while he sang the 2nd. When the day came to sing, he forgot the words and just started to cry so I took over and sang the whole song. haha I will never forget that memory of him. I think that was the first, and last time that he ever sang solo in front of a crowd haha

 I never thought the day would come that I would be looking for music to sing at his Funeral. I wanted to sing all his favorites. Dance with my Father will always remind me of him. If there is a song that I have sang countless times, it would be that song and thats because my Dad would always volunteer me to sing it...For Ward Fathers Day dances, weddings, parties etc; Pretty much every occasion. lol 

I was in charge of the music for the Funeral. It was stressful because we had no time to practice anything. The only time we got to really practice was the day before the service and the day of. All the music that were sung, were my Dads Favorites. I chose to sing I look to you because the words of that song were everything I felt towards my Dad:

As I lay me down

Heaven hear me now

I'm lost without a cause

After giving it my all

Winter storms have come

and darkened my sun.

After All that I've been through

Who on Earth can I turn to?

I look to you

I look to you

AFTER ALL MY STRENGTH IS GONE

IN YOU I CAN BE STRONG...

...And when melodies are gone, in you I hear a song

...I dont know if I'm gonna make it. Nothing to do but lift my head.

...Take me far away from the battle. I need you to shine on me!

I kept telling myself that I wasn't going to be able to sing it without crying so much! So everyday I prayed. Prayed like I never have before, asking God to give me strength to be strong. To give me comfort. We had a week before his funeral services and I really wanted to give him a good service so I tried to get as much crying out as possible before the service.

I have never felt so calm, EVER while singing. I almost always get nervous, singing in front of crowds but this time around was different. It was for my Dad. Call me crazy but I really did feel him by my side that day! I wasn't sad. I was happy. He was at peace, free from pain and suffering. He was with his Mom who he loved soooo much! Why should I be sad? I honestly couldn't believe what I felt, while singing to him. I have never, ever before closed my eyes through most of the song, never felt so sure...not one bit of nervousness in me. Thats why I knew he was there. 

It was a beautiful service. I know he was smiling down on all of us and PROUD of everything we accomplished that week. He brought our family together and in just 2 weeks, we are closer than we have ever been. 

I love you Dad. I miss you! I miss hearing your voice...You are my motivation to live worthy so I can see you again. "I LOOK TO YOU" in everything I do!

-Daddys girl